How To Relieve Stress for Working Moms: Try Doing Less

This post explains how to relieve stress for working moms who want to accomplish it all, but need a framework for when she can’t. You need to learn how to relieve stress whenever you can.

Don’t beat yourself up over not getting everything done. If your mind is racing with the million things that need to get done at work and at home, you’re not alone. It may be the definition of motherhood nowadays. 

Even though we know it’s not attainable, we have a tendency to strive for perfection. So, what if I could offer you a strategy that will help you feel like you’re accomplishing a lot with the limited time you have? 

Don’t dismiss the idea of the bare minimum framework just yet. It’s not meant to take over, it’s meant to help you think clearly and accomplish what needs to get accomplished.

What Is The Bare Minimum Framework?

This isn't about lowering your standards or abandoning your dreams of a beautiful, welcoming home. It's about identifying your non-negotiables (the things that truly make your family feel loved and your house feel like home) and prioritizing them when entering a season of crazy chaos.

Think of it as your family's emergency protocol. When life gets overwhelming (and it will), you know exactly what to prioritize to keep your household running and your people happy.

{Related Post: How to Incorporate Daily Movement When You’re so Dang Tired?}

The Four Pillars of Your Bare Minimum

Pillar 1: Safety Nets 

Prioritize what needs to get done when time seems not to be on your side. 

• Everyone is fed. This doesn’t mean you’re cooking every night. It means that you are providing healthy meals for your family. 
• Everyone has clean clothes. Don’t add the stress of having them perfectly folded and put away, just clean and accessible. 
• Bills are paid, and important appointments are kept. Set up autopay wherever possible and use your phone calendar to keep you on top of what needs to get done. 

Try these systems to prevent chaos when you're stretched thin.

The 15-Minute Reset Rule: Every evening, spend 15 minutes putting your main living space back together. Not perfect, just functional. This means everyone can find their shoes in the morning, and you won't cringe when someone drops by unexpectedly.

The Emergency Dinner List: Keep a few meals in your back pocket that you can make with pantry supplies or grab on the way home. These can include meals that you’ve made previously and frozen, or meals that come together with what you already have in your cabinets.

A Sunday Basket: Use one basket or bin to hold all the week's paperwork, permission slips, and random stuff. Dedicate some time to go through it on the weekend so that the week runs smoothly.

Pillar 2: Connection Points That Count

We can’t get so wrapped up in our “to-do list” that we forget about having moments with our family. You and your family’s connections and overall wellness need to come together.

Family Time Activity: Maybe it's reading together before bed, Saturday morning pancakes, or Friday night movie nights with popcorn. Pick one experience that your family loves and be sure to make time for it each week.

After School Catch Up: Make it a priority to be present when your kids walk through the door. Put down your phone, make eye contact, and ask about their day. Sometimes this happens at 8 PM after soccer practice, and that's okay. It’s really all about connecting. 

Pillar 3: Your Sanity Savers

Because you can't pour from an empty cup, and martyrdom isn't a parenting strategy.

The Good Enough Standard: This might be hard to hear, but sometimes you have to be ok with your house not being picture perfect. Your house needs to be clean enough to be healthy and organized enough to function, but if other expectations are taking center stage, give yourself grace and do only what’s necessary right now.

Entertaining Essentials: Keep a small stash of entertaining basics that make hosting feel doable: wine, cheese, crackers, and chips. You can create a beautiful evening with friends without spending your weekend meal-prepping. Instead of cooking all day, order pizza and focus on the conversation.

The 20-Minute Rule: If a task takes longer than 20 minutes, it either needs to be broken into smaller chunks, delegated, or moved to the weekend. Weeknight energy is precious! Spend it wisely.

Pillar 4:  Your Basic Self-Care

Moms are the foundation of a household running well. Even when you’re not giving 100% to any one task, you are still creating that sense of home and safety for everyone. If you're looking to learn more about this, you may enjoy my post How to Take Care of Yourself as a Working Mom.

With that type of responsibility, it’s even more important to make sure you take care of yourself.

• Get Sleep:  Figure out the least amount of sleep you need to function and do what you can to get it. Sleep is too crucial to functioning to sacrifice it.
• Do What Makes You Feel Good:  Maybe it's a 10-minute walk, a hot cup of coffee in silence, or calling your sister. Build this into your day to give yourself the mental break you need.
• Schedule for basic self-care: Plan to shower, eat, and get dressed. That's it. The fancy skincare routine can wait for a less crazy time.

How to Find Your Family's Bare Minimum

My bare minimum is going to look different than yours. You can figure out your baseline by asking the following questions.

1. What makes our house feel like home? Maybe it's fresh flowers, maybe it's a scented candle, or maybe it's just having the beds made. Identify what it is and prioritize them.
2. What do my kids care about? Spoiler alert: it's probably not the perfectly fluffed pillows on the couch. It might be having friends over or knowing there's always their favorite yogurt in the refrigerator. 
3. What gives me energy vs. what drains me? If decorating for every season makes you happy, keep doing it. If it feels like a chore, let it go. Life's too short.
4. When do we feel most connected as a family? Prioritize these moments. While you may think a different task is more important, it isn’t. Spend time playing a board game and enjoying the most important relationships in your life.

How to Handle Stress As A Working Mom

The truth is that there will be times when you make everything by hand before a party and other times when you order trays from your favorite local restaurant. No one who comes to be with you will care about what is served. They care about who is serving it.

Don’t think of sticking to your defined bare minimum as failing. Think of it as succeeding at what matters while having the wisdom to let go of what doesn't.

Remember, you’re not just keeping a house, you’re creating a home. Sometimes, the most loving thing you can do is model for your kids that it’s okay to be human and have limits.

This post is was all about how to handle stress as a working mom. Please share below any of your favorite helpful tips for moms everywhere.

{Related Post: A Simplified Guide to Self-Care Practices for Working Mothers}